I am day late on this one. I didn’t post anything yesterday. I had written something in the morning and tried to edit it all day. I was still up and working on it at 11pm when I finally decided to let it go. I wasn’t able to wrap it all up in one post like sitcoms seem to do in the 1/2 hour. I had to let the sun set without figuring it all out. It just never felt right. As much as I tried to tie it all together it felt too all over the place and random.
Truth is I was having a shitty day and I was attempting to write my way through it. This is typically helpful for me. I get to dump it all down on a page and see it for what it is, allowing my mess to gain some clarity. Yet, this is usually done without a blog.
There are moments in life when writing and/or sharing, even when you are smack in the middle, is the most brilliant thing you could do. It creates connection and conversation that shine a light on the places that growth is needed. Then there are the moments of life that beg for more time. They cannot be rushed. They require sitting through more sunsets while breathing and finding your roots once again.
Yesterday I tried to write about what I was feeling in a covert way. I was trying to be real without really being real. I had not found my footing yet. I was attempting to rise before the rooting. I was basically trying to get one passed you and in the process, it all started making less and less sense to me. What was I even trying to say? So, no post.
I did not, however, scrap it. I kept it for me. I will go back and get real with it. I will take out the phony and add the nitty gritty. I will find my footing and recognize my roots.
What I do know is that each sunset I am present to is preparing me for the connection and conversation that being here can bring. I look forward to rising with you.